Steven Helmer Publications

Synopsis: Mayberry has elected a new mayor, Roy Stoner ( Parley Baer ), who doesn't like the way Andy ( Andy Griffith ) runs the sheriff's office. The mayor's overzealous nature leads to a direct standoff with Andy when the sheriff decides to let a prisoner ( Roy Engel ) take a 3-day leave to tend to his crops, a move that could result in Stoner sending an unfavorable report to the governor. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/the-andy-griffith-show-episode-review-andy-and-the-new-mayor-1962/

Synopsis: Barney ( Don Knotts ) convinces Andy ( Andy Griffith ) to give his cousin, Virgil ( Michael J. Pollard ) a job helping out at the Sheriff's office. However, Virgil proves to be horribly clumsy and, after a series of accidents ranging from crashing the squad car to destroying the keys to the jail cells, Andy wants him gone. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/the-andy-griffith-show-episode-review-cousin-virgil-1962/

Synopsis: After Andy ( Andy Griffith ) arrests a newspaper publisher ( Roy Roberts ) and brings him back to Mayberry to pay a $15 fine for speeding, the publisher decides to get revenge by having a reporter ( Sally Mansfield ) dig up dirt on the sheriff. Barney ( Don Knotts ), believing the reporter is a college student doing a research project, inadvertently provides fodder for a defamatory article and Andy is brought up on charges from the State Attorney's office as a result. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/the-andy-griffith-show-episode-review-andy-on-trial-1962/

Synopsis: A well-planned bank robbery goes awry and, during the course of a shootout with the locals, the $35,000 in stolen cash goes missing. Things go from bad to worse when the rest of the outlaw gang rides into town to free their captured companions and demand, by gunpoint, the townspeople find the money immediately to avoid having one man killed every 30 minutes. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/movie-review-fury-at-gunsight-pass-1956/

Synopsis: Jennifer Hills rents a remote cabin so she can have peace and quiet while writing her novel. A couple days after checking in, she is brutally gang raped by several of the locals, including the sheriff and, after jumping off a bridge into a river, is left for dead. A month later, she returns and seeks revenge on the men who attacked her. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/movie-review-i-spit-on-your-grave-2010/

Synopsis: At one point in her life, Patricia Martyn-Broyd was a moderately successful novelist. Now in her seventies, her books are no longer in print, her agent is deceased and she is largely forgotten with her only (reluctant) friend being Constable Hamish Macbeth. When a TV producer wants to turn one of her murder mysteries into a show, she is thrilled. However, her elation soon turns to despair when she learns the show's scriptwriter wants to turn her conservative novel into something racy. As a result, when the scriptwriter and, later, the show's leading actress, are murdered, she becomes the favorite suspect and it is up to Hamish to find out the truth. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/book-review-death-of-a-scriptwriter-1998/

Synopsis: A pair of aging sisters are two weeks away from finally inheriting their family estate, which they plan on donating to a local doctor so it can be turned into a hospital. However, someone is secretly trying to prevent them from fulfilling the requirements of their father's will and it is up to Nancy Drew, with the help of her boyfriend Ted, to figure out who that person is. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/review-of-nancy-drew-and-the-hidden-staircase-1939/

My wife wanted to do some sort of family activity this weekend and, after some consideration, I decided to visit the Oeschner Park Zoo in Baraboo. Part of the reason for this was the fact it was free (I didn't want to spend our grocery budget). Plus, it was only about an hour away. Overall, we enjoyed ourselves. It's not a huge zoo but there was a decent selection of animals. Plus, we enjoyed walking the river trail afterwards. My only suggestion, if you visit, is to make sure you have cash with you. I ended up putting what was left of my cash in one of the donation boxes before realizing I could use quarters to buy food for the goats and the souvenir stand didn't take credit/debit cards. We'll have to remember that the next time we go. Here are some photos I took:

Synopsis: Nancy Drew and her father travel to the country so they can help a close family friend who has been accused of murdering his neighbor. Things become more complicated when the neighbor's missing body turns up in their friend's field and Nancy is distracted by her father's romantic interest in a new neighbor. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/movie-review-nancy-drew-troubleshooter-1939/

Synopsis: Richard Abernethe had been in poor health so, even though he died suddenly, there was no reason to suspect foul play. That's why, when his sister, Cora, suggests he was murdered during the will reading, his remaining heirs, already counting their money, think she is a fool. However, when Cora herself is bludgeoned to death with a hatchet, Richard's lawyer, Mr. Entwhistle, begins to suspect there might be some truth to what she had suggested and ultimately reaches out to his old friend, Hercule Poirot. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/book-review-funerals-are-fatal-1953/

Synopsis: Charley Brewster travels with his friends to Romania to study European artwork as part of a college class. Shortly after arriving, however, he discovers his professor is really infamous vampire Elizabeth Bathory. By the time he convinces his friends he isn’t crazy, it’s already too late and it is up to him to rescue his girlfriend with the help of a reality show vampire hunter. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/movie-review-fright-night-2-2013/

Synopsis: A pair of siblings are able to purchase an old house in rural England for a bargain price and quickly learn the reason they were able to get such a good deal was because of the home's tragic history. Their only clue about what really happened are a pair of spirits that seem to be connected to the 20-year-old granddaughter of the man that sold them the property. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/movie-review-of-the-uninvited/

Synopsis: A high school nerd joins a group of regulars in detention after school. However, their detention is interrupted when one of the students, complaining about being bitten by a bum, turns into a zombie and they realize the problem has spread to the rest of their school and beyond. As they take refuge in the school's library, they must overcome their various differences in order to survive. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/movie-review-detention-of-the-dead-2012/

Synopsis: The Enterprise docks at a starbase for repairs following an encounter with an ion storm and Kirk ( William Shatner ) faces a court martial for ejecting a research pod and causing the apparent death of one of his crew members. Kirk maintains his actions were necessary. However, computer records of the event show him pushing the eject button prematurely, putting his career in jeopardy. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/star-trek-episode-review-court-martial-1967/

Synopsis: Strapped for cash and taking care of a sick brother who needs a bone marrow transfusion, Iris agrees to attend a dinner party thrown by a wealthy philanthropist in the hopes he will give her money and move her brother to the top of the donor list. What she doesn’t know, however, is she and seven other guests must first compete in a sadistic version of the game Would You Rather until only one person is left alive. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/movie-review-would-you-rather-2012/

Synopsis: When Captains Hawkeye Pierce and Duke Forest are assigned to the 4077th Mobile Army Surgical Hospital, they become immediate friends. They, along with chest surgeon "Trapper" John McIntyre immediately show their value as surgeons. However, their constant disregard for authority often gets them in trouble with their commanding officer, Henry Blake, and other Army brass. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/book-review-mash-a-novel-about-three-army-doctors-1968/

Synopsis: A plain-looking woman is treated like a slave by her stepmother and stepsisters and ostracized by her town because of her dirty appearance and anti-social behavior. Things change, however, when she meets a strange woman by a secluded pool and the local duke's son invites her to attend the palace ball. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/movie-review-the-glass-slipper-1955/

This is a book I worked on with my oldest daughter a few years ago. It's based on a story I wrote when I was roughly her age and edited when she discovered it and said I should try to publish it. I had her draw the illustrations. The book is available on Amazon:  https://www.amazon.com/Journey-Bubble-Planet-Steven-Helmer/dp/1494946130

It's been about 6 years since I first published this book, which is a follow up to my first published book, Love Poems for My Wife . The book uses poetry to express my feelings about marriage and being a dad. The book is available on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Messy-House-Home-Steven-Helmer-ebook/dp/B00H68BRQ0/ref=sr_1_fkmrnull_1?keywords=a+messy+house+is+a+home+helmer&qid=1558184159&s=gateway&sr=8-1-fkmrnull

Synopsis: The Enterprise discovers a human outpost has been completely obliterated and, after a short fight with the lizard-like Gorn, pursue the alien ship in an attempt to destroy it. However, another alien race, the Metrons, intervene by disabling both ships and sending both Kirk (William Shatner) and the Gorn captain to a deserted planet so they can fight each other in hand-to-hand combat. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/star-trek-episode-review-arena-1967/

Synopsis: When wealthy businessman Geoffrey Berowne is poisoned, ambitious Scotland Yard sergeant Jack Gibbons is assigned to help with the investigation and invites his wealthy friend, Phillip Bethancourt, to accompany him as a consultant. The primary suspect in Berowne's death is his much younger wife, Annette. However, despite having a motive and two other much-older husbands who died suddenly, Scotland Yard does not have enough evidence to arrest her. To make matters worse, Annette is a very charming woman who, in no time at all, has Jack under her spell. Realizing his friend's career could be in jeopardy, Bethancourt must find evidence of Annette's guilt or innocence before it it too late. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/book-review-the-young-widow-2005/

It is a pretty nice day out today so, even though the trails at the park are still a little on the muddy side, I decided to risk it and get a walk in.  Here are some of the photos I was able to get:

Synopsis: Already buried in debt, responsible for his mentally handicapped brother and expecting to be a father, Elliot Brindle is shocked to learn he is being fired from his sales job for being too meek. So, when he receives a mysterious phone call telling him he will be rich if he completes 13 different tasks, he is quick to accept. However, as the caller increases the odds and has him perform illegal activities, Elliot realizes he must either complete the "game" or his life will be worse than it was when he started. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/movie-review-13-sins-2014/

Synopsis: Dr. Frederick Gilchrist has a reputation of being a very poor dentist with a habit of pulling teeth rather than trying to fix them. But, when Hamish Macbeth wakes up with a massive toothache, he decides to risk it. However, instead of getting his tooth examined, he stumbles upon the murdered Dr. Gilchrist and must solve yet another homicide. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/book-review-death-of-a-dentist-1997/

Synopsis: In 1962, the Italian ocean liner Antonia Graza disappeared without a trace. Forty years later, the ship is discovered abandoned and adrift by a salvage crew that intends to cash in on their find by towing the ship to port. They soon discover they aren't alone and the ship is haunted by malevolent spirits that have already lured other ships' crews to their deaths. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/movie-review-ghost-ship-2002/

Synopsis: In the year 2045, the majority of the population finds an escape in a virtual reality world known as the Oasis. Many of them spend their time searching for three keys left behind by the world's now-deceased creator with the promise whoever finds the keys will control the Oasis. When a rival corporation pools all its resources in an effort to find the keys and essentially take control of both the Oasis and the real world, a group of gamer friends team up to stop them. They have success but their efforts also put their lives at risk. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/movie-review-ready-player-one-2018/

Synopsis: When the steward at a remote family estate dies under mysterious circumstances, Lady Susanna Appleton's husband, Robert, doesn't seem overly concerned and insists on letting his attorney handle it. However, when Robert is called away on a mission for Queen Elizabeth, Lady Appleton decides to defy her husband's orders, visit the property in person and fix it up while trying to learn the truth behind two deaths and a mysterious ghost that has scared away most of the servants. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/book-review-face-down-in-a-marrow-bone-pie-1997/

We have an ice skating banquet this afternoon but, since it is a nice day out, I've been trying to get some stuff done outside first. I happened to see some birds on our feeder this morning, grabbed my camera and got a couple photos.

Synopsis: A truck carrying toxic waste outside Prosperity, Arizona accidentally dumps a barrel into a water reservoir, contaminating the crickets that are used to feed the spiders at a nearby spider farm. As a result of this, the spiders grow to an unusually large size, escape and, using the abandoned gold mine that runs under the town, begin to hunt the residents. You can read my review here:  https://wizzley.com/movie-review-eight-legged-freaks-2002/