Steven Helmer Publications

Synopsis: Struggling to find his way in life after being wrongly imprisoned for murder, Mike teams up with his friend, Dandy, and kidnaps actress Laurel Stevens on the night her new movie The Kidnapped Bride premieres. They have one major problem, however, once the word of the kidnapping gets out, everyone, including the police, think it's just a publicity stunt. Realizing her career will be ruined if people don't believe she was really kidnapped, Laurel tries to help the pair. Adding another complication is she is beginning to fall for Mike and doesn't want to see him go to prison again. Who's in it? The movie stars Jane Russell , Ralph Meeker , Keenan Wynn , Fred Clark and Una Merkel . Review: I added The Fuzzy Pink Nightgown to my movie library a few days ago, mostly because I haven't seen a lot of Jane Russell movies and wanted to give her a try. From the description, I wasn't really expecting much more than a goofball comedy. However, it ended up bein...

Synopsis: Chicago private detectives Abe Allard and CS Duffy are given the opportunity to pad their pocketbook when the wealthy Geo McMahon hires them to find a piece of art stolen from his private collection. The theft seems odd from the beginning, a sketch from a relatively unknown artist that wasn't anywhere near as valuable as the other pieces in the collection. The case becomes even stranger when similar pieces are also stolen and Abe's daughter, Matilda, comes across a message board suggesting the stolen artwork contains clues to a hidden treasure. Review: I am going to be honest and say I had some doubts about Where Art Thou when I got it through my library last week. While I did enjoy the previous two Abe & Duff books, I've always been a bigger fan of murder mysteries and the thought of them investigating a basic art theft sounded a bit dull. However, after reading it, I have to say I was pleasantly surprised. There were a few things I really found I liked ab...

Synopsis: Hardened criminal Johnny Cabot is recruited by bank robber Fred Dorella for his latest heist. Cabot's job is to hold Nancy Wilson hostage in her home while Dorella demands $70,000 from her husband, Ken, the bank's vice president and to kill Nancy if he doesn't receive a phone call confirming the bank robbery's success. As the minutes wind down, Borella discovers an unexpected complication - Ken has been having an affair, plans on leaving his wife and Nancy's death would make it easier for him to marry his mistress. The movie also has the alternative title Door-to-Door Maniac . Who's in it? The movie stars Johnny Cash , Donald Woods , Cay Forester , Vic Tayback , Pamela Mason and Ron Howard . Review: While I do consider myself a Johnny Cash fan, I had completely forgotten the legendary country singer also had an acting career until I came across Five Minutes to Live on one of my movie channels. I was intrigued enough to watch it this morning and wa...

I wasn't sure if it would be worth the time putting one of my trail cameras out last night because I knew we were supposed to get a heavy rain. However, I had to take something out to the garbage bin yesterday evening and since I was already outside, figured I'd at least put one by the house. As expected, there wasn't a ton of activity because of the weather and the rain tripped the camera quite a bit more often than critters did but I did still wind up with a few photos:

My zucchini is well past the starter plant stage, but this Wisconsin weather just isn't going to work for me to put it outdoors, at least not as long as the temps are dropping to the thirties at night. So, I brought some planters and a bag of dirt to the office with me this morning and guess I'll just grow it indoors for a while. Perhaps by the end of the week I can finally take them outside, especially since I may need to do the same with my tomatoes soon.

  I spotted Lucia's Morning Melts Breakfast Pizzas a few weeks ago but decided not to get them because I thought they were a bit too expensive. However, I saw they were on sale yesterday and picked up a couple to give them a try, including the Americano Breakfast Pizza I made this morning. Unfortunately, even on sale for $4.99 each, I don't think they were worth the money. One thing I did like about this product was the ability to make it in the microwave rather than needing to dig out my pizza oven or preheat my kitchen oven. And, unlike some other microwaveable pizzas, this one did come out of the microwave with a crunchy crust. The biggest complaint I had (and my wife shared this) was all I could taste was the crust. The toppings were a bit lacking, and I didn't think it had a whole lot of flavor.  At best, even at my most generous, I couldn't say this was any better than any other frozen breakfast pizza I've purchased. In fact, there were two brands in the same ...

The weather cooperated last night, though it was cold once again, so I put out one of the trail cameras behind the house to see what critters came to visit. It was a fairly busy night, with plenty of variety, including one of the occasional visits we get from the neighborhood raccoons. Here is a selection:

  Everyone had Friday off from work and school, so we took a family trip down to Madison and on the way back, stopped by Costco. I saw Rana Southwest-Style Linguine near their meat section and thought it looked interesting enough to give it a try. Overall, I wasn't disappointed. Fortunately, my kids decided they wanted something else because there really wasn't enough in the packaging to make much more than a meal for two.  However, as far as convenience goes, it was one of the easier meals for two I've ever made. All I had to do was open the package, combine the ingredients in the container provided and cook in the microwave for eight minutes. I started this after my wife got out of the shower and it was done by the time she got dressed. I thought the linguine had a unique flavor. The andouille sausage gave it a bold taste without being too spicy and certain filled the kitchen with its aroma as I was cooking it. There was also plenty of chicken and vegetables to go with th...

We had a gap in the rain today and I finally got around to filling the bird feeders, so I decided to put the trail camera out on the patio table again. As expected, the neighborhoods made sure to visit and get more than their share from the feeder, giving me some great photos of them:

Synopsis: Thirteen years after being imprisoned in a mental institution for murdering Harriet Anderson and Ward Lamson with his hook hand while they were apparently having an affair at Lovers Lane, Ray Hennessey escapes and starts a killing spree. Ray's original victims' spouses, Sheriff Tom Anderson and Principal Penny Lamson believe he is going after their kids, Mandy and Michael. Only, there is a lot more to the story than they realize. Who's in it? The movie stars Erin J. Dean , Riley Smith , Matt Riedy , Suzanne Bouchard and Anna Faris. Review: I came across Lovers Lane a few days ago and since it had been a while since my wife and I last watched a slasher film, I added it to my library. While my expectations for a film I previously had forgotten existed weren't very high, the movie still failed to meet them. There are a couple things wrong with this film. One of the main ones is it take a long time for anything to happen and, even then, there are long gaps be...

Synopsis: A World War II Royal Air Force squadron led by American Wing Commander Roy Grant is given the task of destroying a German rocket fuel plant in Norway. The plant's hidden location means the squadron can only destroy it by bombing an overhanging cliff until it collapses. Making the mission even more dangerous is the failure to destroy anti-aircraft guns beforehand, putting the No. 633 Squadron at risk of a suicide mission. Who's in it? The movie stars Cliff Robertson ,  George Chakiris , Maria Perschy , Harry Andrews and Donald Houston . Review: I ended up picking 633 Squadron this morning much in the same way I picked yesterday's film , it came first alphabetically on my library list. At first, I wasn't too sure what to think about the movie, which featured a fictional mission rather than a real-life event. However, it ended up being an OK choice. The film is what I would describe as a basic war movie. There is a firm mission and objective established earl...

Synopsis: After his dreams of becoming a champion are crushed by an eye injury that cost him his license, New York professional boxer Ernie Driscoll now drives a cab while trying to save enough to buy a gas station. Already in a foul mood after discovering his wife, Pauline, having an affair with career criminal Victor Rawlins, Ernie winds up with a warrant for his arrest when his actress friend, Linda James, tricks him into believing she needed his help as part of an elaborate Broadway audition, and he assaults the play's producers. To makes matters even worse, Ernie finds Pauline's strangled body in the back of his cab, and he realizes he is being framed for her murder. Who's in it? The movie stars John Payne , Evelyn Keyes , Brad Dexter , Peggie Castle and Frank Faylen . Review: I've had 99 River Street in my movie library for a few weeks and finally decided to watch it this morning because I was in a bit of a hurry and figured it would be fastest to just pick th...

Synopsis: In the year 1985, a spaceship crew consisting of Captain Neal Patterson, Lt. Mike Cruze and Lt. Larry Turner are ordered to escort Professor Konrad to a space station in Earth's orbit. While enroute, a mysterious beam destroys the station and causes damage to their ship that results in them landing on Venus. Believing the planet to be uninhabitable, they are surprised to discover it is populated by beautiful women under the rule of Queen Yllana. They learn the men have either been killed or imprisoned by Yllana following a war with another planet that left her disfigured and the queen plans to destroy Earth before it has a chance to declare war on her planet. Their only hope is a group of women who hope to overthrow the queen so they can be with men again. Who's in it? The movie stars Zsa Zsa Gabor , Eric Fleming , Laurie Mitchell , Lisa Davis and Dave Willock. Review: I've had Queen of Outer Space in my movie library for a couple months now and never found th...

Synopsis: Arriving back in present-day London, the Doctor ( Ncuti Gatwa ) seeks help from UNIT to track down the identity of a mysterious woman ( Susan Twist ) who has appeared as multiple incarnations during his travels with Ruby Sunday ( Millie Gibson ). At the same time, he also enlists UNIT's help in tracking down Ruby's long-lost birth mother. In doing so, he inadvertently releases Sutekh, who immediately begins wiping out all life in the universe. Review: As I mentioned previously, my wife and I spent part of this past weekend getting caught up on the previous Doctor Who season so we can start watching the newer episodes that just started airing this month. This included watching the two episodes, The Legend of Ruby Sunday and Empire of Death , which I'm going to lump together since they were basically a two-part season finale. After watching them, I would describe my opinion as being a bit disappointed. My biggest problem with these episodes is the same one I had ...

Synopsis: While attending a 19th Century British ball, the Doctor ( Ncuti Gatwa ) and Ruby Sunday ( Millie Gibson ) must confront a group of alien shapeshifters, known as the Chuldur, who are killing off and impersonating guests as part of a Bridgerton cosplay. Helping the Doctor is a bounty hunter by the name of Rogue ( Jonathan Groff ), who also becomes a love interest for the time traveler. Review: The new season of Doctor Who just started so my wife and I made an effort to get caught up this past weekend, starting with Rogue . Overall, I think I can say I enjoyed this one. The main plot is a little confusing because the cosplay alien idea doesn't make a ton of sense if you think too much about it. I would assume the Chuldur aren't time travelers because, if that was a common alien technology, the Doctor wouldn't be anything special. Yet, unless I misunderstood something, they were cosplaying a 21st century show in the 19th century.  That said, I did like the idea of ...

Synopsis: Upon learning of his sister's death, Larry Adams travels to the estate of her husband, Dr. Max Heinrich Von Altermann with private detective Scott Warrington to learn more. When they arrive, they learn his sister, Lila, along with many of the servants, has been brought back from the dead by Von Altermann and is now a zombie. However, unlike the other zombies, Lila is able to act independently and has a plan to get revenge on her husband. Who's in it? The movie stars John Carradine , Robert Lowery , Gale Storm , Bob Steele , Mantan Moreland and Mauritz Hugo . Review: I picked out Revenge of the Zombies this morning because it's been a while since I last watched a zombie movie and, at least from the brief description, I was intrigued. As it turns out, I didn't enjoy it as much as I thought I would. The movie, which is described as a horror/comedy, falls much more in the latter category, with a surprisingly large number of scenes being dominated by the driver...

Our little Stormcloud was going nuts most of the day yesterday because the neighborhood squirrels were on our patio table cleaning up the birdseed they dumped from one of our birdfeeders. At my wife's suggestion, I stuck one of the trail cameras on the table and here are some of the photos I was able to get.

Synopsis: Raised by his two older brothers after his parents were killed in a car accident, 1965 Tulsa, Oklahoma teenager, Ponyboy Curtis, is a member of the Greasers, a northside gang made up of members of the city's poorer families and in direct rivalry with the more affluent "Socs" living on the southside. After meeting a Soc, Cherry Valance, and hitting it off despite their differences, Ponyboy and his friend, Johnny, are attacked by her boyfriend and a group of other Socs, resulting in Johnny killing one of them. Even though it was self-defense, the boys know their Greaser status will result in criminal charges and flee town, only to return after an unexpected act of heroism leaves Johnny severely burnt and near death. Meanwhile, the Greasers and Socs are preparing themselves for a blowout rumble. Who's in it? The movie stars C. Thomas Howell , Ralph Macchio , Matt Dillon , Patrick Swayze , Diane Lane , Rob Lowe , Emilio Estevez and Tom Cruise . Review: My wi...

Synopsis: Horace "Sach" Jones is invited to an estate in London, England, to visit a distant relative, a wealthy but elderly earl who wants to meet all his potential heirs before he dies. Sach accepts the invitation and travels across the ocean with his four friends in tow. The earl takes a shine to Sach and wants to make him his primary heir but when the rest of the relatives find out, they plot to kill both the earl and, if needed Sach. Who's in it? The movie stars Huntz Hall , Leo Gorcey , Bernard Gorcey , Angela Greene and Walter Kingsford. Review: I came across the Bowery Boys film Loose in London last night and decided to watch it this morning. Since I've had mixed opinions of the previous films I've watched, I wasn't really sure what to expect but this did turn out to be an OK film to watch. As is the case with most later Bowery Boys movies, the film does the bare minimum to keep the concept alive by having a smaller "gang" but with the f...

Synopsis: Jane Parker travels to Africa to join her father, an ivory trader in search of a fabled elephant graveyard. Despite her father's misgivings, Jane joins his latest expedition into the jungle only to be kidnapped by a mysterious white man in a loin cloth who lives with the apes. Despite being scared, Jane manages to communicate with the man, learning his name is Tarzan, and eventually falls in love with him. However, while she has a desire to live in the jungle with Tarzan, her duty and devotion to her father stand in the way, as do the dangers (animal and human) that surround them. Who's in it? The movie stars Maureen O'Sullivan , Johnny Weissmuller , C. Aubrey Smith , Neil Hamilton and Ivory Williams . Review: I came across Tarzan the Ape Man in my library this morning and while it had been a long time since I last watched this film and couldn't remember enough about it to know if I enjoyed it, I ended up deciding to give it a try. Overall, it turned out ...

One of my all-time favorite movies is the film Clue , a movie that is based off the board game by the same name. While most other game-inspired movies haven't become cult classics and even less (including Clue , ironically) were box-office bombs, the recent success of A Minecraft Movie shows there's potential. My daughters alone have seen the movie twice (on the same day). The recent success of that video game-inspired film got me thinking about the games I enjoyed when I was younger, and I thought of three that could have (and maybe could still be) entertaining on the big screen. Mutant League Football  Suggested Plot : Despite being part of a successful coaching family and showing potential as a college offensive coordinator, Susan Holtz-Lombardi's gender creates a roadblock to her dream of becoming a football head coach. This changes when she is offered the opportunity to coach the Midway Monsters, a team in the start-up Mutant League. Despite the obstacles created by c...

Synopsis: Henry Grant is in love with his fiancée, Marcia West. However, their relationship is put in jeopardy when the 20-year-old develops a crush on actor Basil Underwood. Hoping to correct the situation, Henry asks Underwood for help and, seeking to redeem himself for all the times he lied to and cheated on his own fiancée, Joyce Arden, Basil agrees to go Marcia's house and make her fall out of love with him by acting like a cad.  However, as his attempts repeatedly fail, Underwood's loyalties to Joyce are tested when he realizes he is attracted to Marcia's unwavering devotion. Complicating matters is Joyce unexpectedly arriving to see Marcia in Basil's arms. Who's in it? The movie stars Leslie Howard , Olivia de Havilland , Bette Davis , Patric Knowles , Eric Blore and Bonita Granville . Review: While I like classic comedies, I usually avoid watching them first thing in the morning because I'm always afraid my brain won't be awake enough to catch the...